He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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