States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Randomize
