I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
