How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
It's Friday. Sex?
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
my mom just told me its unladylike to have toothpaste stains on my clothes all the time.. if she only knew.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
The walls are thin & apartments are narrow so all the bedrooms are next to each other. Our complex could compete in synchronized orgasms.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
You told me you were trying to learn all the MLB ballparks while you waited for your porn to load.
Randomize