Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
Randomize
