Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Holy shit, you lost your virginity on 11/11/11. Now every time someone fucks you, they can make a wish. Your vagina has officially been transformed into a wishing well.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
The sigh of relief when u realize none of your drunk texts will result in permanent damage
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
How the hell do you misplace a bag of tacos in a closet?
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
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