Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
So basically our separate showers turned into one shower, to save water, which turned into a bath, which turned into sex on the bed, which turned into drinking beer in the bed, and thats what the stain is from... bud light. sorry.
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
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Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
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A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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