I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
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