Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Its okay. I just know how you can text with your hands cuffed behind you back, so I had no idea what "oh shit" meant.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
Randomize
