Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Come over? It's my birthday
How many times has that text failed you tonight?
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No one should ever be so high that they forget the food. That's just...its a violation of God and Nature, of the very laws that we live by!
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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