that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
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