i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
You don't have a penis so I'm not texting you at this hour. This is penis texting hour only.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
Randomize