I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I think if I set up a series of baby gates up the stairs each one more difficult to undo then the last that should be able to stop your drunk vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Randomize