Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
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