hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
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