i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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