She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
