Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
We're having chugging races with long island ice tea, I won. To often
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Will exercising make me less horny?
Randomize
