can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
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