So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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