I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Dude, fuck these noisy kids, fuck all this light, and fuck you for getting to sleep while I have to be productive and hungover.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
