My hand turned me down
she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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