this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
remember last night when you and I took turns yelling THIS IS HUGE in my dogs faces? I love wine night.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
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