How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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