You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Randomize
