My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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