I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Mars, I'm going to name my child horatio mars. He will hate me till he gets high. Then he'll understand
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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