People in love make me want to vomit
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
Listening to Joy Division and applying for Walmart. You get to choose which one is more depressing.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
