dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
