what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
he was so high, he talked to my goldfish for an hour telling him the dangers of overfeeding.
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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