Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(778): View more from British Columbia

i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.

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(508): View more from Massachusetts

my brother came home with a bottle of vodka and his pants off. were gonna spend more quality time together.

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(778): View more from British Columbia

Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.

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(615): View more from Tennessee

Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?

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(+61): View more from Australia

It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.

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(315): View more from New York

My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.

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