I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
