I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
When he came downstairs he looked at me like I was attempting to rob his house.
Did you reintroduce yourself?
He threatened to call the cops.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
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