I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Nothing will stop me from making the title of my paper "The Great Political Cock Block." Absolutely nothing.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
