I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
you will always have a special place in my vag
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
