And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
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But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
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I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
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