K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
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