let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
Just had to explain to a senior manager why I had duct tape residue on my wrist and hand. This weekend was a success.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize