Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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