Tell her she can't have a vagina
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Fist pumping is hard when country music is playing FYI but I am committed
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Randomize
