Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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