no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
Now that my 6 day bender is behind me, I just realized I might have been the one who took a shit in our mailbox that past few days.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Randomize
