hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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