I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Ladies don't puke and tell
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
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