I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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