He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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