I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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