I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
im so hung over everytime my dog barks the sound vibration makes my whole body hurt
He tried to make small talk to hide the fact that he was struggling to unhook my bra... at least he tried right?
Dude, please tell me you know why there's a naked chick asleep outside my room.
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
