yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
so he was shitfaced and kept using sticky notes to label everything like "beer spill" and "going to fuck later"
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
He said he discovered the mysteries of the universe inside an orange... I want whatever he was on.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
