First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
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He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Nothing kills the mood like opening another guy’s dick pic in bed
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