She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I wore sweatpants. When I show up to a booty call in sweatpants there's your warning
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
